So ladies, do you wanna lose 20 lbs in a week? (may lose your teeth as a small side effect… nothin to worry about… that takes a few months) Get them chiseled cheekbones everyone is dying for? (small chance you may literally die) Go for that oh, so stylish Grunge look? Get a free headshot modeling portfolio courtesy of your local police department? (The police may even throw in some free room and board if lucky) and… you will never need to tweaze your eyebrows again (they get burned off by the torch as a bonus).

Boys… Same as above, but, you get a better deal! yep, you can have sex for hours on end because you can’t cum (please be aware that only applies to weekend use, daily use causes the limp dick syndrome… sorry, it can’t all be good)

So check out these great results… WOW, like totally awsome

and, I must add, This lady actually did get her free headshot portfolio! (courtesy of the police department)… but really, 10 years is a long time to wait. Trust me, I say it can be done in weeks, these hotties did it, so can you!

This lovely lady got the full treatment in only 6 weeks! yes those incredible sucked in cheeks can be yours in as little as 6 weeks! and can you see how much higher her brows look since her eyes squint a bit from the light now. Also, she has that just been punched in the mouth full lip look that so many ladies pay the cosmetic surgeons for… always a plus!

This mother daughter team is very special. Yes, I gotta admit the meth makeover system did not work as quickly on them, but look at the results and you will agree the changes are in fact RADICAL. Now there is a downside to the Meth family plan (you can see the daughter crying over it), The family unit must share and that may cause a bit of tension between them… but rest assured that any conflict will always be resolved (courtesy of the police department…again, when they both get room and board together). Then they get the family portfolios and get to discuss the awsome headshots together… The flip side is they may get into another small argument over which one of them the meth belongs to… each one trying to do the “right” thing and give the meth to the other… and that is true family love.

To prove how well the system works… check this out. This is an actual client NOT A MODEL! and she got her own billboard due to the Crystal Meth system!

So now I have covered all the benifits… please send 29.95 to 1234 IamaTweakerLoser street apt 666, trailertrash, California to order yours!

I will even give you the Meth fuckedintheass guarantee that you will NEVER get your money back if you don’t like the system!
I guarantee that you will love Meth so much that you may want to lie, cheat and steal from everyone who cares about you just to get more! yep! you will love the Meth RADICAL makeover so much that you will steal from your girlfriend who supports you, lie your ass off as you take your grandma’s jewelery… and even go on LONG Meth missions in someone else’s car!

WOW! who can resist again… to try the Meth system please send 29.95 to 1234 IamaTweakerLoser street apt 666, trailertrash, California to order yours!

and now a short word from our sponsor
LIE, KILL, CHEAT, GO NUTS
LIE, KILL, CHEAT, GO NUTS
LIE KILL CHEAT, GO NUTS
LIE, KILL, CHEAT, GO NUTS

k, enough of that

Getting back to the Meth System, here are our awsome ingredients… only the best will do.

Cooked ephedrine or pseudoephedrine found in cold medicines or weight loss aids. The pills are crushed into powder, then blended to a steady boil with other solvents like starter fluid or Coleman fuel. Its strained through one of your children’s diapers and set aside to dry in the basement or living room. The foaming white, crumbly residue can be smoked in a traditional, contemporary American crack pipe [high in 3-5 minutes] — or placed on tinfoil, heated from below with a cigarette lighter and the vapors inhaled [high in 2-3 minutes]. If the end product looks more like crystals than powder, they can be melted over a spoon, sucked into a communal syringe, and injected into your bloodstream [immediately high]. And, I hear that sticking it in your ass is very popular in gay culture. Also, the 2 later ways may give you that HIV bonus while I hear the first few may only get you the Hep C. So of course, with a bonus like that, the gay community is all over it… and you too can be GAY yourself and order! again… please send 29.95 to 1234 IamaTweakerLoser street apt 666, trailertrash, California to order yours!

So you can see that we spare no cost.. and even include a bit of us in the mix like with the kids (maybe dirty) diapers. We go all out!

and… If we mess up and use a diaper that may be too old and dirty and the meth looks a bit brown, we add the additional expence of coloring… yes guys, you can get f’ed up meth in colors (we screwed it up so its not clear, but we fixed it by adding pink dye to the crystal meth)

The dye system to fix the dirty diaper problem has become so popular that a fishing company even named a fish hook over it… WOW!

can you believe it… Our Meth makeover system has gottan so big that a large fishing company has named a great product for us… Thanks guys, we need all the publicity we can get about our efforts to make the customer happy, even if we gotta spend the extra 5 cents on dye due to dirty diapers!

please send 29.95 to 1234 IamaTweakerLoser street apt 666, trailertrash, California to order yours!

as a closer, let me leave you with all the money you can save on dental work, since you may not have teeth left… we all know thats just AWSOME!

please send 29.95 to 1234 IamaTweakerLoser street apt 666, trailertrash, California to order yours!

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